Friday, March 20, 2020

The Second Time Bride!

Welcome to my blog! Usual rules apply. My blog, my thoughts, your opinions are not necessary. This blog was written by both my husband and I! We hope you are inspired by our story.

Now...Introducing Mr & Mrs Hood

This Second time bride finally found out what it really means to love someone selflessly.

Our Story began back in 1991, I was a Jr and Ryan, a Sr. He was into every sport imaginable. He would walk me home from school, even though I lived literally across town and he 2 blocks from the school. I think he just like my mom's spaghetti.

We hung out at a friends place as I was not allowed to be alone with him or any boy for that matter.

He finally gained enough courage to ask me on a date. I was 14, he was 17 turning 18 in July, so the obvious answer was NO. My mother wouldn't let me go. I begged and I begged and found a compromise, mom got to come as chaperon and driver. I was so happy! I was going to see the Christian Comedian Mike Warnke with Ryan!

So a few days before, doesn't Ryan cancel. He forgot to take time off. I ended up having to go to the show with my mom and a friend. I was bummed for sure and kind of upset too. I had to beg and plead and offer my first born to go on a date that I never got to go on.

Things get foggy in my mind from there... I remember school ending and signing years books and than everyone and everything fading into history.

Fast Forward to 2010

Life was up and down. My mom had passed away in 2004, I got married a month later, had my daughter in 2005 and moved to Alberta in 2010. I had just open my facebook account and low and behold one of my first friends! RYAN!!!

As funny as it was, he was a trucker and just so happen to be in the same town as me running a load through! So I invited him over to meet my family. We spent the evening catching up and I really hate to say it, but I knew right then, I still had a spark in my heart for him. He left that evening and went back to his world and I to mine.

About 5 years later, and a failed marriage under my belt, I found myself back home in Ontario. I was visiting my father who had developed Alzheimer and was staying with a friend while I got back on my feet. Little did I know that Ryan was going through his own personal nightmare, which ended in a divorce for him too. I find it interesting that we would run across each others paths at the moment when we needed each other most. 

Disclaimer Here... a do as I say not as I do moment! 

I believe with all my heart that God brought us together and many others have confirmed it. While the timing was crappy, and previous marriages had ended and things weren't perfect and we didn't do things the way we ought, we both recognize God had His hand in our lives. 

The best part of being with God is His salvation for our stupidity. Isn't it good to know that God already knew what you were going to do even before you managed to do something and screw it up! However, just because we messed up big time does not mean you are exempt from God's laws anymore than we were. True repentance is key to God's forgiveness.

We started working together, and spent nearly 2 years 24-7 together in a transport truck. All that time growing and learning about each other. We saw our world together and it was the best 2 years of our lives. There was so much peace and contentment. So much so, that when his divorce was finalized a few months after my own and 3 years after reuniting, we got married on February 15th 2019! The same day my mom and dad married nearly 47 years ago and it was both their second marriage too!!!

So, the questions has been asked.

What is it like now that we are officially married?

It's been year and a month and I love being married now. I love how it feels. It's much more different than my "trainer husband", you know round one, because we are different in every way. I feel that I truly married a man who's soul is the same as mine. After spending 2 years together, and not wanting to kill him, I know that we have a great chance at making it. The stats are against us. But GOD is For us!!!


What's the biggest difference?

I feel that Ryan and I are both on the same page. I won't tarnish my ex, but lets just say, we had different books altogether.

The bible says how can two walk together if  they do not agree? Amos 3:3
and Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? 2 Cor 6:14

Compatibility is a must. I once told a lady who was contemplating divorce but wanted to save her marriage the following:

You must put your man first, no matter how annoying the request feels to you, how disruptive the request is to what you are doing, you must make him feel like he is a king and you must respect him above all else including your children. 

And being friends with the husband I gave him this advice:  

You must put your woman first, no matter how annoying the request feels to you, how disruptive the request is to what you are doing, you must make her feel like she is a queen and you must love her above all else including your children.  

 They couldn't. they eventually divorced.

See a man does not need love like a woman, he needs to be respected and treated like a king and a leader and she, she needs to know she is loved and protected. Because man was made for woman and woman for man.

Ryan makes me feel loved and shows me love and even more, he loves my daughter, so in turn, I respect him and I show him that by letting him lead our family.

 Plans for our future

Only God knows the road we are walking on, and I am just humbled and blessed that I have Ryan and my daughter to walk with.

Ryan said that he is looking forward to our future and building lasting relationships with all our family. 

With Gid as the pillar of our family we can weather any storm. Standing on the firm foundation of Jesus Christ is a must.

Everyday, make it a point to say loving and encouraging words to one another even if you are grumpy and snarky.  A kind word turns away anger...

Good Night folks!

Ryan and Bernie






 

Tuesday, May 14, 2019

I Love To Tell The Story

My blog...my rules.

I'm on a long drive up some by gone highway that I haven't travelled in a long time. My husband Ryan, is playing some old time gospel music. The music takes my mind back to when I was a little girl.

I am a pastor kid, my life was spent at innumerable church meetings and tent crusades. Listening to these hymns, I can almost hear my mom singing along...almost. Mother's day has just past. I am missing her. It's been over a decade since I heard her voice, heard her sing.

My best crusade memory is being in a time and a place where everyone was happy and all singing their hearts out to God. Both men and women! I imagine, it is like hearing angels sing.

Time seems to stop when you are in the moments of praise and worship. Especially, when you are all in, when you close your eyes to everyone else around you.

When you finally let yourself be enveloped by the music and the atmosphere around you is beyond peaceful. Where you don't have a care in the world and your neighbour fades away with the melody. You feel as if you could just float right out of your mortalness into the arms of Jesus Himself.

🎶What a day that will be when my Jesus I shall see!
When I look upon His face the one who saved me by His grace 
When He takes me by the hand and leads me to the promised land. What a day, glorious day that will be!

You leave feeling more alive, more intune with God and have hope.

My mom, was born in 1939. She attended many revival services too, she grew up at the peak of the Pentecostal movement. She often reminisce about the tent services and how people left feeling so full of hope. Seems like hope is a long time gone.

HOPE! That is what this world is missing out on. The Hope of Jesus and the love and peace that can only come through Him.

People today are more worried about their popularity and fan base that they live lives that have so very little meaning and superficial. Lots end up in early graves, think of Marilyn Monroe.

The pursuit of power, fame, fortune is not new but it seems to be more important in our era of humanity. 

🎶Turn you eyes upon Jesus
Look full in His wonderful face
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim
In the light of His glory and grace.

Folks, if you read this far, I hope you will take some time now, and just sing a hymn of praise and Thanksgiving to God.

You can't stay upset when you have a song in your heart for Jesus.

Tuesday, March 1, 2016

I AM A SINNER! I am going for a divorce.

Well you know the drill when it comes to my blog, I am not about to sugar coat a single word to sooth your over sensitive souls. So keep reading if you have a strong constitution and can mind the occasional potty word. 




IS THERE ANY SIN THAT IS NOT COVERED BY THE BLOOD OF CHRIST?

Did I miss a memo? Was there a list that I didn't see? 
*excluding blaspheming the Holy Spirit



Once upon a time I use to be just like everyone else. I use to think that I had a legitimate god-given right to look down my nose at everyone because I was "MORALLY SUPERIOR". Oh how the mighty fall... I am getting a divorce and holy cats have I been privy to some really weird extremes here. On one side I have people who support me (not knowing the whole story) and on the other side, I have people condemning me for my decision and telling me God will hate me. So this is why I must rant to you today...

One of my greatest pet peeves is people using the Word of God to hurt fellow believers and non-Christians alike. They take a particular scripture and just bash the beegeebers out of some fallen person till that person wants absolutely nothing to do with God ever; and even some believers fall away. 

I'm gonna shock you all now! I sinned, actually when I looked at the 10 Commandments, I've broken more than my fair share. I AM A SINNER...but dadgum it, I AM SAVED BY GRACE!

IF GOD'S WORD IS TRUE, nothing I can do will separate me from the love of God.


Romans 8:38

I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love which Christ Jesus our Lord shows us. We can’t be separated by death or life, by angels or rulers, by anything in the present or anything in the future, by forces or powers in the world above or in the world below, or by anything else in creation.

It bothers me to no end that people separate sin by their view of what is worse. SIN IS SIN IS SIN. All sin no matter how great or small is still sin, AND ALL sins are covered by the blood of Christ when a person repents.

Adultery, Murder, Abortion, Lying, Gossip, Hate, Divorce, Theft, 

IF EVEN ONE OF THESE IS NOT COVERED BY THE BLOOD OF CHRIST THEN GOD IS A LIAR, CHRISTIANITY IS FALSE AND I WILL RENOUNCE JESUS. 

Why did Jesus have to die for our sins?




The reason Jesus had to die for our sins was so that we could be forgiven and go to be with the Lord. Jesus is God in flesh (John 1:1, 14, Col. 2:9), and only God can satisfy the Law requirements of a perfect life and perfect sacrifice that cleanses us of our sins.
All people have sinned against God. But, God is infinitely holy and righteous. He must punish the sinner, the Lawbreaker. If He didn't, then His law is not Law, for there is no law that is a law without a punishment. The punishment for breaking the Law is death - separation from God. Therefore, we sinners need a way to escape the righteous judgment of God. Since we are stained by sin and cannot keep the Law of God, then the only one who could do what we cannot is God Himself. That is why Jesus is God in flesh. He is both divine and human. He was made under the Law (Gal. 4:4), and He fulfilled it perfectly. Therefore, His sacrifice to God the Father on our behalf is of infinite value and is sufficient to cleanse all people from their sins and undo the offense to God.
https://carm.org/christianity/christian-doctrine/why-did-jesus-have-die-our-sins


THINGS THAT PISS ME OFF

1) Gossip. I have noticed lately that there are far to many men and women gossiping around the churches. One of the greatest lies they tell each other as they spend their time bad mouthing other people is that they need "support" or "advice" from other Christians. While this is marginally true, the reality is you really only need to talk to a very SELECT few about your personal problems... you DO NOT have the right to tell anyone else problems, just yours. I suggest your Pastor being one, perhaps a parent if you have one or your best friend but not every single person who turns their ear to you. I hated going to women's groups because some woman would inevitably pray for her "friend" who's spouse is a lying cheating sack of donkey dung. Seriously. SMH!!!!

2) Airing of your dirty laundry in public. For the love of all that is Holy and good in this world, SHUT THE HECK UP ABOUT YOUR PERSONAL PROBLEMS!!!!! The more people you wag your gob at about the problems in your home is only causing damage. EXAMPLE I will use me. Many of you know that I am getting a divorce. But the reasons are between me and my ex and a very select few people. People who are directly involved 3, my pastor and my best friend. Frankly, what happen between me and my ex is OUR BUSINESS and I will not tolerate wagging tongues and I will not expound on our reasons.

3) Bad Mouthing Spouses. OH MY WORD!!! I don't care how bad your spouse treated you. SHUT YOUR HOWLING SCREAMER ALREADY! Sure your spouse could have been the south end of a north bound donkey but that's between you and them. Why do you think you have a right to run your mouth? THIS IS GOSSIP. PERIOD. Shush it. GOD HATES GOSSIP especially those who run their mouths in families causing more problems.

Do you people realize the more you slander someones character the harder it is for them to follow the right path?

The whole point to Jesus dying on the cross people is to bring EVERYONE into right standing with God.

Romans 5:8

But God commandeth His love towards us, that while we were yet sinners, CHRIST DIED FOR US.

4) Twisting God's word to suit your purpose. Holy Cats does this boil my blood. I HATE with a passion how some people take scripture and start to twist the very words of God to brow beat someone who has little to know understanding of scripture.

5) Last but not least, Pastors who empower people to emotionally and mentally abuse each other.

The last time I checked, FORGIVENESS was an ABSOLUTE with God. If your pastor is telling you that you have a biblical right to hold ANYTHING over your partner or child or friends head then I tell you right now, get the hell out of Dodge! You as a Christian have absolutely no right to hold anyone sins against them. Who the heck do you think you are? God? Even God does not do that to us!

Psalm 103:12

As far as the East is from the West, so far hath He removed our transgressions for us.

Lets look at a little list of Biblical hero's...


Abraham... Liar, Unbelief, Lust (took Hagar)
Lot... incest
Moses... Murder, Divorced
Rahab... Prostitute
David... Murder, Liar, Adultery
Bathsheba.... Adultery
Solomon... Bigamy on an epic scale, adultery, fornication, murder, idolatry

Excluding Moses and Lot... Abraham, Rahab, David, Bathsheba and Solomon are all in the bloodline of Jesus.

Frankly folks the whole problem I am having is that Christians are becoming to be far more concerned with keeping up their appearances then being accepting of fallen brothers and sisters. You know, I've noticed a lot of divorce care groups pop up in churches recently which is great, I really like the idea, but I want to see more. I want to see divorce care groups that help heal individuals who's marriages have ended due to things like adultery, abuse or homosexuality. I want to see the Adulterers, Abusers and Homosexuals BACK IN CHURCH WHERE THEY BELONG. Not cast aside because they "caused" the marriage to break down - which isn't really true, it's always 50/50 when a marriage dies.

I am of the opinion it is better to leave a marriage because you can not commit, will not remain faithful or uncertain that abuse will not occur to your spouse then to continue on living a lie and hurting one another. Whether I am correct in my opinion will be revealed when I get to heaven, but I know for a fact that I'm still going their. I am certain of my salvation and the forgiveness of my sins. My God, the God of the bible is not a tyrant psychotic psychopath! My God allows me freewill to choose my path and which road I WANT TO WALK.

FYI: Your marriage covenant, by the way was broken the very first time one of yous laid a hand on the other in violence - you broke your promises of love and protection. Adultery and homosexuality are not the only reasons for a divorce, abuse is too.

Food for thought... When Adam and Eve sinned in the garden.....

a. Why was temptation put in their midst, unguarded, within reach?
b. Why was the serpent allowed to roam in the garden?
c. Why did God not stop Eve?

FREEWILL.

God has given each and everyone of us FREEWILL to choose which road we need to walk down. And yes, sometimes walking away from a marriage happens. Yes God can repair a broken marriage, true. But sometimes we willing make our decision and live with the consequences of our actions. Sometimes, as fallible humans we just stop giving a rats ass and are just too far gone to give a snort about fixing anything.  OUR lives our own to live. We must walk whatever path we decided on. Good, bad or indifferent. We have to do what we personally can live with. And frankly, I believe in my heart of hearts I am doing what is right for me and I will deal with life as it comes my way.

God will not hate you because you choose to divorce your spouse. God knows whats going on and while He does hate divorce, He has made provisions for you through GRACE only brought to you by the SHED BLOOD OF JESUS.

Forgiveness is for EVERYONE not just those perfect people who attend church on any given Sunday.

UPDATE: My divorce became official in August of 2018. Today, my ex husband and I are on better speaking terms then we ever where before.  I know I did the right thing and I know that God has not ousted me from the kingdom either.

Rant done... coffee time.



NB.
Freewill is up to you but you live with the consequences of your choices.
















Tuesday, May 19, 2015

THE CHRONIC LEMON SUCKER!

When Life Gives You Lemons... THROW THEM BACK!!!! Yeah you heard me! Welcome to my blog! Today, I am going to give you chapter 7 out of my book that I can't afford to print. I know I should wait, but it's an awesome chapter!

Disclaimer... my blog, my posts, my thoughts, NO COPYING... don't be a loser and copy my work, that's just a being a jerk.


The Chronic Lemon Sucker


I adore the title of this chapter! You’ve heard the saying “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade”. It’s a lovely sentiment really, but what do you do if you don’t want to make Lemonade?  What if you think you have the RIGHT to be snarky and jaded and you actually want to be offended and angry…Well now, I’ll tell ya. You can and will develop a chronic case of being an embittered chronic “Lemon Sucker”.

Some of the characteristics of any Chronic Lemon Sucker are as follows:


  • Depressed, 
  • mean, 
  • self absorbed, 
  • defensive, 
  • walking in Offense, 
  • critical, 
  • gossiper, 
  • sarcastic, 
  • rude, 
  • ignorant, 
  • mean spirited and lets not forget...
  • spiteful

Some CLS (chronic lemon suckers) are even abusive physically but more so with their mouths. They can tear a stranger down in less than a minute for simply looking at them the wrong way. They are always on guard and ready for a fight, even if they are in the wrong. Especially if they are wrong, because they know and have something to prove!

They have a strong need to defend themselves, due to the fact they probably never had anyone stand up for them or have come out of one dark and horrible life.

The Chronic Lemon Sucker can be any age, gender or skin tone.

Now, if you are reading this and are being honest with yourself and find yourself saying, yeah that’s me! Don’t worry, you are not alone. I took all those traits from myself personally. I am a recovering “Chronic Lemon Sucker”.  And if you don’t see yourself in any of the aforementioned words, Congrats because you are able to be living a Godly life and or are in denial!

Gal 5:22-23

“22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. Against such there is no law.”

There are 9 fruits of the spirit…Do you possess them ALL? (I know I don’t) IF not, I suggest you keep reading.

 Unfortunately, not all of us want to exhibit the Godly fruits of the Spirit simply because we don’t want too. It’s far easier to be miserable and self loathing then it is to be happy and cheerful, even the Godliest of people fall short of this goal at times. We all get into a bit of self pity here and there and it is in reality Lemon Sucking! There are days when you want to be in a bad mood. It’s purely a choice.

BUT HAVE NO FEAR!!!! There is a cure to being a Lemon Sucker. Do you recall poor little Elijah sitting out there in the dessert throwing himself a pity party and no one was invited because they were all supposedly dead or gone, and something came an ate his shade while he was snoozing? If Elijah can have a bad day, I’m sure the rest of us can too. Even Isaiah had bad days! He stood before the LORD in chapter 6 and admitted he was a "man of unclean lips and lived among a people of unclean lips!"

Let’s take the time to look at the life of Lemon Sucker.

When you are a Lemon sucker, you are miserable all the time! The JOY in your life is pretty much nil and that tends to put people off. You seem to push people away because no one can stand to be around you for very long. Nastiness breeds nastiness. It’s like a contagious disease. You seem to have a dark cloud over you all the time and feel hopeless like there is just nothing and no one out there that can help you.


You tend to blame every little thing on your past experiences, every Negative thing that have ever happen to you. All the chance encounters all the abuse (physical or other); has drawn you towards the bitter juice of the lemon. And eventually what you put into yourself will come out of yourself. Garbage in, Garbage Out.

Luke 6:45 “45 A good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good; and an evil man out of the evil treasure of his heart brings forth evil. For out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.”

I knew this woman; I met her in high school. She came from a very nice background. Her house was so big; I got lost looking for the front door! Her parents did everything for her. When I met her she was 16 and her mommy cleaned her bedroom! My mom stopped doing that when I was 6!

Anyways, reflecting back, I don’t ever remember this girl smiling. She always came to school with a scowl on her face and a chip on her shoulder. Her very countenance was dark. As years passed, she ending up getting married and have 3 kids and then ended up divorced in a matter of 7 years, although she never actually celebrated a single anniversary with her husband.

Her excuse was this…My step dad was mean to me, he didn’t give me everything I want.

My mother was mean to me because she wouldn’t let me do what I want.

My mother in law was mean to me because she wouldn’t let me do what I wanted.

My husband is mean to me because I’m expected to be a wife and mother.

My kids expect too much from me and I'm too tired to give.

She blamed everyone for her problems. And to this very day has never allowed for happiness to enter her life. She is very bitter, right to the core. She even attended church with me for a couple of years but even the Love of Jesus was too hard for her to handle. She is a CHRONIC Lemon Sucker.  Today, she is still bound by those lemons and honestly, you can see it in her physical appearance, bitterness has covered every inch of her, But there is still hope for her as long as she has breath in her body. People like this need one thing, lots and lots of prayer.

In essence a Lemon Sucker is heading the wrong way on the right road regardless, of their Christian walk. I’ve been born again since I was 4 years old, but I still manage to step out of God’s protection and into bad things while still attending church. I can get gossipy, I can get mean... I can fall. It wasn’t till I was in my 20’s that I realized that I was actually putting myself in danger of Hellfire. And for someone like me, that scared the snot clean out of my nose! I’m a pastor’s kid for heaven sake! I thought I was 100% safe! WRONG! I can just as easily choose hell as I did choosing God! That’s a personal choice and God will honour it...up or down, my choice.

 I spent a good many years being offend at every chance I got, in church, on the street, to even school. It was super easy at school! I blamed my classmates for not liking me because I was a Poor little Christian half breed Indian girl. I figured that was a good reason to be mad. After all, these white kids had the best of everything, and I had to wait forever to get anything because money was tight and boy did they loved to taunt me and make fun of and bully me.

Then as I got older, I figured I could hold offence to how I perceived people treated my family. I come from a single parent home and around these parts and at that time, it was looked down upon –times have changed eh. Even in the churches you were treated differently because there wasn’t a man in the house. So again, I used that as an excuse to be angry.

Next, my mother remarried  this “super neat” guy she had been dating – note the sarcasm. When they got married holy cats! Did all hell broke loose! He turned into an evil, physically abusive man over night! So I drew more anger from there. Because why? I was abused and my mother couldn’t stop it? And my mother was abused and I couldn’t stop it! And my brothers were abused and nothing could be done because we lived in fear! Waking up in the middle of the night to a man you view as father choking the life out of your mother...makes up for a messed up mind.

From then on I knew something was different. I was in a constant depression. I literally felt dark. Like the joy in my life had been sucked right out of my body. The light was snuffed out. There was something in my life that made me feel miserable. And I didn’t do a thing to change it. In fact, I embraced this darkness.  Imagine that a “PK” who isn’t perfect! (PK is Pastor’s Kid)

Not that I had any understanding at that time. I didn’t know or realize that I was doing anything out of the norm. It was normal for teenagers to be depressed. It was normal for teenagers to act out. These things were accepted as a part of growing up. Actually statistically speaking, our generation and our kids, today are the most depressed generations ever to live! The rates of suicide are extremely high compared to say 50-100 years ago.

How wrong was I! These things are not normal! And it’s high time that we start to address these problems. Especially with our kids today! They're Baby Lemon Suckers in training! 

Lemon Sucker is a nicer term then what it really means. A Lemon Sucker is a Spiritually Oppress or even possessed person. Spiritual oppression can start any age. It usually stems from a negative experience that has happen to you. Something as simple as getting your bottom tanned for being caught with your hand in the cookie jar to something painful that actually scares your memory like sexual abuse. Weirder still, it can be something that happens to your mom that she passed down to you unknowingly. Generational Spirits.

Generational spirits are like a witch's cat...a familiar. Something that knows your family history back to the dawn of time and who likes to bring all the bad stuff from the present to the future. I am part Indian. Even though I never suffered alot of the abuse that my ancestors did, I still get pangs of anger when I see things like residential schools or even documentaries on things like Wounded Knee. Not that I suffered, but my ancestors did and their junk is packed neatly into my families emotional trunk that has been dragged through every preceding generation. BUT I don't have to own the junk in the trunk... more on that in a bit.

The sad thing is that these negative things take full control over our lives because we don’t have the tools to deal with them or are under the delusion that it’s acceptable. It is not acceptable. It’s in fact very dangerous.

A lot of lemon suckers actually end up committing suicide. They are so involved in their feelings of loathing and worthlessness that they can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. (I mention this earlier in the book - see, it needs to get to print!) They’ve been embittered for years and it’s overtaking them. So much so that it’s a final solution to the question “Why was I born if I was only meant to suffer?” I know this because I have attempted suicide and failed, thankfully, but I did have to spend time in the nut house for that one.

Personally, it took me a long time to get over things that I experienced in my life and even today, I’m dealing with these issues as I remember them. I’m sure that I have blocked out a lot of memories that I don’t want to deal with. But I am an over comer through Christ Jesus! AMEN!

I had a lot more control in my life when I was miserable because I used it as a tool to get my own way. As with a lot of other disorders, people use them to manipulate other people to get what they want. It’s a sick reality that we have to deal with. There’s a new saying now “Hurt people, Hurt people”. Read it over till you get an understanding.

I was hurt. And all I wanted to do was hurt people in return because they shouldn’t be allowed to feel good when I was hurting. I actually resented happy people. I felt that everyone ought to be miserable and suffer with me. I couldn’t stand to have happy people around me. I like to find people who were worse off them me, because I felt better. It’s like a skinny girl hanging out with fat girls to make herself feel better about her body.

I made my choice to be a Lemon Sucker. No one had to ask me or force me. I did it of my own free will.

Lemon Sucking is a CHOICE. You don’t have to sit there and blame God or the world for all the hardships you’ve had. You don’t have to go around hurting people because you’ve been hurt. You have a choice! It’s up to you.

Other then walking in all this Lemon Sucking offense, try walking in love. If more people did that, we would be way better off.

Now how do I walk in love? Get an understanding first. If you have this background of Lemon Sucking then understand that there are others out there just like you who are having a bad day or life; other than being ready to beat the stuffing’s out of someone, be ready to give a shoulder to cry on. Empathy goes a long way.




I just finished reading a book called Driven by eternity, by John Bevere. I hated every page in that book because ever word condemned my actions. I now realized that I really don’t have a RIGHT to do as I please. I have a RESPONSIBILITY to live a Godly life. And I’ll tell you the truth- It’s hard! I fail every single day. But I don’t stop and give up, I keep trying.

You don't have to OWN the JUNK in your trunk!


What you are doing when you’re walking in love is in essence breaking old habits. You are dying to your old nature and ways of doing things and learning new ways to combat your bad behaviour.  I wouldn’t think twice about telling someone off. Now I actually think before I speak but not all the time. And I do use the WWJD –What would Jesus do. It’s a real eye opener. But like I said, I’m not perfect. I’ve been a miserable sought for a good many years; I am not going to change overnight and neither will you...BABY STEPS!

There’s this new craze going around our Christian community it’s called Inner Healing. I personally think every single person on the planet ought to go through it. We need to start dealing with our past hurts because they are what cause us this present pain. They affect ever single aspect of our lives, from how we relate to family to spouses.

There are some things in our past we need to repent from. Other things we need to ask forgiveness for.  And still other things, we MUST let go of. We can’t walk in love if we have a suit case full to over flowing with Garbage. It’s impossible. It’s dragging us downward and away from our goal of total freedom!

We must make choices now and live with the consequences of our actions. And the most important thing is to stop blaming ever man and his dog for all the problems in our lives. We are the ones that make our decisions we are the ones that mess things up so now we need to get out the broom and dust pan and start cleaning it up and dumping it into the garbage bin where it belongs.

If you have been abused physically, sexually or emotionally, it’s going to be hard. But your first step to healing and drinking lemonade is to forgive the person who hurt you. Even if you never speak to this person, make it an act of your free will to forgive this person. YOU TAKE THAT FIRST STEP AND FORGIVE THEM FOR HURTING YOU! LET GO! You don't need that baggage anymore. Don't own that junk any more. They have NO MORE POWER to hurt you when YOU forgive them!

You really don’t need to hold onto that resentment because all it’s doing is tearing you up inside. Forgive – Forget – Move on! That’s my new motto. What I'm saying here is this...Chose to forgive that person, Forget what they've done and move on. You don't have to be buddy,buddy with them you just have to Love them with the Love that Only Jesus can give. Love - you won't harm them, you won't slander them, you go about your life free from the chains that bounded you to them. There is nothing that you can do today that will ever change what happen yesterday, but we have JESUS who can take the hurt away faster than you can blink! And that’s more then sufficient to cover over those hurts.

The things that we hold onto inside will eventually make themselves present in our lives by influencing behaviours and reactions to certain situations and even into our physical beings. We will start to literally feel the sin in our bodies. And I truly believe that a lot of the sicknesses we deal with today are a direct result to things like un-forgiveness, hatred, anger etc. All these negative emotions are hurting us. They are literally causing cancer, arthritis, and heart disease. It’s not just the 3 packs of cigarettes that are killing you it’s your emotional well being as well.

Look around. You see it every day everywhere. You’ll see a person all twisted and misshapen and find them to be harboring a lot of hatred in their lives and because it’s coming out in their bodies, they are worse off and some are beyond mean!

As an act of your free will start forgiving people! I’m going to say that over and over till you get it!

I want you to make a list here, on this list will be the people who have ever done you wrong, and as you write down that person’s name, I want you to write ONE positive thing they have done for you. Then, when you are good and ready, I want you to take each person, one at a time before the LORD and by an act of your free will, forgive them. It’s high time you and I start to focus on the good thing people have done for us and not the negative. If you can't find anything nice to write, then write beside them this "The nicest thing this person ever did for me was to unknowingly lead me to the loving arms of Jesus"

 If the person has passed away, put them on your list still, you don’t have to go and meet everyone individually; you just have to forgive them. And while you’re at it, ask the LORD to forgive you for your Un-forgiveness.

 Mark 11: 25-26, 25 “And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. 26 But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.”

Notice that if you don’t forgive the mistakes of others, God will withhold His forgiveness of you? This is very important because you are stopping God’s favour and blessing from flowing in your life.

How important is it to you to have your own way. How important is it to harbour hatred in your heart towards someone. Do you really have to be angry? Do you really need to be justified because no one has justified you? The answer is NO! These things are not important.

Jesus is our advocate. He sees what is going on. He knows how we are feeling. He knows our hurts and the thing is we don’t have to suffer those hurts anymore because when Jesus died on that cross 2000 years ago, he died for our hurts, our pain, our SINS! He justified you with the shedding of His precious blood!

We can STOP lemon sucking! It’s not that hard. All we have to do is start rolling these hurts onto Jesus and let him deal with them. Yes, I know, you probably went through some terrible ordeals in your life, but there is nothing impossible for God to change!

You still need to let them go, they really aren’t doing you any good anyways. If you want that ABUNDANT life that God is offering to you today, you have to let them go! They are holding you back from becoming that person you were meant to be and they are able to destroy you from the inside out.

I personally decided that fighting with certain members and ex-members of my family really wasn’t worth stopping the flow of God’s blessings on me and in my life. I finally, after 20 years figured out that God will justify me. (I'm a slow learner) I even went a step further and asked forgiveness from these people for any offense I caused them, and not for any other reason than I was sorry.  I don’t want to rekindle any relationship with these people, nor do I have too, all I’m required to do is apologize, forgive them, and forget the history. It is easier for you to say you’re sorry then for them to hear it. Heaping coals of fire on them may just burn that resentment off them. What they do afterward is not your problem, if they wish to harbour ill will, it's not your problem. The LORD just wanted you to be obedient to Him.

There is way too much drama in this world, and I don’t want any part of it. All I want now is to have my sanity. I want to be happy for a change. I’m tired of being stuck under that grey cloud sucking back bitterness and un-forgiveness. I like being in the warmth of the sun. It’s beautiful. Nothing is grey and miserable anymore, I see colours! I see flowers! I see everything that God created for what He created it for, my enjoyment!

Yes I know that life is full of bad situations but really, I can’t control that, but what I can control is how I react to it. When someone hurts me I have to remember “water off a ducks back” … let that hurt roll off me. I know that the person who is saying it is hurting themselves. I can see my former self in them and I should know by now how not to react to them. It’s not important whether I’m right or wrong, what is important is that I let God defend me and I must now start to act in a manner befitting a Godly woman. God is going give you every opportunity to change. He will put situations in front of you for you to react too. How are you going to react now? Same old, same old? Or have you found that New way of thinking?

Like I’ve been saying it’s an uphill battle ever day because of my sin nature, but if I keep at it, everyday will get easier for me and it will become second nature eventually.

You don’t have to be a lemon sucker. You don’t need to allow bitterness to take root in you; you don’t have to be miserable! You can have your lemon and make Lemonade if you want too. Make that choice today.
 Are you done with your lemon yet, you wanna finish it? I have a garbage pail here for you. (I’ll touch more on forgiveness in chapt 8)

Let’s Do Something Proactive! So, Life Gave us lemons…you and I are going to do something productive with them icky things…we are going to make us some Lemon-Aid!

 Ingredients for Lemon-Aid:
 A cup of love:
❖   Prov 10:12: Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all sins
❖    1 Peter 4:8: And above all things have fervent love for one another, for “love will cover a multitude of sins.”

A cup of Compassion:
❖   Matt: 18:33: Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?
❖   Matt 5: 38-40: 38 “You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’39 But I tell you not to resist an evil person. But whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. 40 If anyone wants to sue you and take away your tunic, let him have your cloak also.

A dash of understanding:
❖   Prov. 18:2: A fool has no delight in understanding, But in expressing his own heart

A Pound of forgiveness
❖   Mark 11: 25-26:25 “And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your trespasses. 26 But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your trespasses.”

And a little bit of time... for yourself to sit back, put your feet up and learn that walking in love is not an easy thing to do but know it can be done IF you allow Gods principles to take root in you and start to grow and soon you will be able to bear the fruit of the spirit and never mind the lemonade, why not have a pitcher of Fruit Punch!


Gal 5:22-26
 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. Against such there is no law. 24 And those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. 25 If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. 26 Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another.
 

Be G.O.D blessed!

***Bonus excerpt from an upcoming chapter***


Getting blessed by God is a great reward for your "Faith in God" Mark 11:22, but there is a reason for it... you have been blessed to be a blessing! Not as some think and claim to "feather your own nest"... No, that's just more of that genetically altered religious nonsense trying to say that God cannot trust you with His blessings!

See when Jesus cursed that fig tree in Mark 11, He did so because it was NOT a blessing to Him when He WANTED!

In like manner, what good are we if we can not be a blessing when others want?

We need to G.O.D Bless!-

GIVERS ON DEMAND!

You know God is the greatest giver ever and works on the Law of Sowing & Reaping...See, the devil is legalistic, there are protocols that must happen or else the devil can move! Natural laws states you have to sow first before you reap a harvest! God knew that! So He had to follow this law too...

For God so loved the world that He GAVE...God SOWED His only son so that He could REAP all of us as His sons and daughters! We are the HARVEST that The SEED Jesus produced!!!

So, if you want all the Blessings of God, start your giving! You MUST SOW before you can REAP a harvest!

Today, Ask the LORD for the opportunity for you to be a blessing! A Giver On Demand!

Grow Up Already!

I think this is going to be my favourite section of the entire book, next to the Chronic Lemon sucker… We are now going to talk about Maturity!

Now, there is absolutely nothing wrong with having a bit of fun now and again. In fact I urge you to play at a park or do something fun. I still watch and enjoy cartoons! Some people like to go for rides on bikes or fishing – anything (well anything that is good for you) as long as you can let your hair down and chill out for a bit. You can’t always wear a 3 piece suit!

You know what, I love getting all gussied up to go to church on Sunday, but when I get home, I’m in a pair of track pants and shirt that probably smells like yesterday. I just want to chill, and toss my socks in the corner so my lovely painted toes glisten in the sun light.

Men…there is nothing worse than high heels. I don't own any!  I rather wear my camo girly crocs or sketchers Mary Jane’s …I love my Mary Jane’s. I’m all about comfort now. When I was young, I couldn’t wait to wear high heels…what was I thinking…? But looking good on the outside doesn't actually mean we are grown up on the inside...

So what does the bible have to say about growing up? Maturing?

1Cor 13:10-11 “But when that which is perfect has come, then that which is in part will be done away. 11When I was a child, I spoke as a child; I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things.”

Heb 5:12-14 “For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you again the first principles of the oracles of God; and you have come to need milk and not solid food. For everyone who partakes only of milk is unskilled in the word of Righteousness, for he is a babe. But solid food belongs to those who are of full age, that is, those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil.”

Spiritual Maturity is not an option, it is a requirement. You must grow. Even in the natural, no one stays a new born. Everyday our physical bodies grow and change, and soon before you realize it, you’re watching your own kids grow up.

Maturity starts when you take the initiative. You must be the one to step up to the plate and seek God and His will for your life. Maturity, just like everything else takes time. I told you all that I’ve been saved virtually my entire life. Even so, it doesn’t mean that I could preach when I was 8 years old. I had to grow up in Christ. Likewise a new born Christian must grow up in Christ. Sound doctrine is essential to growth.

Step by step by fall by step you will begin to grow in Jesus. It’s a difficult journey but you are more than able to do it. Phil 3:13 says to strain towards the goal! So press in! While we are beginning to mature, we must not only seek God but start to take responsibility for our actions too. For years we have walked in sin and did things our own way, and where has it gotten us? No closer than when we first began.

YOU MUST COMMIT YOURSELF TO GOD!

You have too. 100%. Your flesh will start to give you trouble as you begin to walk in God’s will because your Spirit is trying to take over. And Lord knows how that will go over right. Too bad, so sad, you got to put down those old things like in Treasure two, breaking those chains of your life. The very best place to start is by getting into the word daily. Once you have your foundation, you can start to build on it.  If you can commit to reading the bible every day, you are able to take a lot of ground back from the devil.

Remember Plan A and Plan Me… Plan A is Gods way, Plan Me is messed up. You have to start being “Transformed by the renewing of your mind”. Romans 12:2 Prepare your mind for action, and as I’ve said before, take EVERY thought captive into the obedience of Christ! (2Cor 10:5)

I kind of like verse 6 too, “6and being ready to punish all disobedience when your obedience is fulfilled.” There it is again, Obedience! Everyone knows that a key to raising a godly child is obedience. We have to be taught to be good for heaven sake!

You know just by reading the Word of God alone every day, you will begin to see a difference in your life. When you add some good solid foundational teaching, you will flourish like a well watered plant!

I call theses “signs of Maturity” I am working on them too, daily and I figured why not share them with you.

1. A Christian should be a person with only ONE face!
One HUGE problem we as Christians have today is back stabbing. We are kind and friendly to ones face but the second they turn around, we start. Let’s take a lesson from the movie Bambi "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all." Thumper had it right there!
1 Timothy 5:13
At the same time they also learn to be idle, as they go around from house to house; and not merely idle, but also gossips and busybodies, talking about things not proper to mention.

2.  A Christian IS his brothers’ keeper.
Yep, you heard me, we are to make sure our Christian brethren are always on the right path, and we should restore them with LOVE when they faultier. Raise them up to their former standing in LOVE. That means to Forgive, Forget and Move on. If we cannot forgive, how then will the Father forgive us?

Mark 11:25-26
And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins."

3. Christian should be THE example.
If Jesus was perfect why can't we be? He was just a man, flesh and blood...why then can't we strive for the same?  It's really not all that hard...all we have to do is die to ourselves and be born in Him! Choose his nature over our own sin nature. It's not easy because we struggle daily with our flesh but we have one thing...Forgiveness. We can do it if we put our minds to it. Be ye Holy for I am Holy!

1 Corinthians 15:49 And just as we have borne the likeness of the earthly man, so shall we bear the likeness of the man from heaven.

4. Christians should do good to please God.
Who rightly cares what man thinks of You! I don't, I only care what God thinks of me. He’d love me even though I dressed like a FREAK and my hair was blue! You know when you stop bowing to the will of man and seeking the will of God things will change drastically for you.

REMEMBER if the Devil can't steal your joy he can't get your goods!

Hebrews 13:16 And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.

 5.  Don't expect to be liked.
Hey the world hated him first! Why should you be so lucky??? Just remember the most important thing here is to belong to God, not man, what can man offer you? Misery? Loneliness, broken hearts? The LORD offers you Love, Happiness and Life eternal!

John 15:18-19 If the world hates you, you know that it hated me before it hated you. If you were of the world, the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.

6. Be Doers of the Word.
Make it a guide book to living, a "How To" book for your new found life style! Study it, live it, share it with everyone. The bible is full of helpful tidbits on how to get through this life.
 James 1:21-22
Therefore lay aside all filthiness and overflow of wickedness, and receive with meekness the implant word, which is able to save your souls. But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.

7.  Our Characters should be above reproach.
Start cleaning out that closet, you don't need anything in there besides a broom and dust pan. Confess your sins to one another and forgive yourself your sins because God has the moment you ask for forgiveness. And remember not to fall into the trap of the devil, who will try and remind you of your sins even though our Father has forgiven them.

1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

8. Be proud of being a Christian!
Blab it baby! The world needs to know! Scream it! Sing it! Paint it on your car! Wear your t-shirt, Advertise for Christ! "WE WILL NOT BE UNDER-SOULED!!!"
If people can cuss in public, you can Praise the Lord in public too!!!

Matthew 10:33 But whoever denies Me before men, him I will also deny before My Father who is in heaven.

9. Love the UNLOVEABLE
Yeah the hardest one...love those who would rather punch your day lights out. Love those who smell so bad your nose hairs burn off, Love those who aren't in your "circle" of friends.  Jesus loved them all, even when they killed him; he still loved them enough to ask God to forgive them! Now that is love! (I struggle hard with this one!)

Matthew 5:44 But I say to you, LOVE your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you…

10.  Do what is right in God's eyes.
You don't need to follow the crowd...go and do it the right way, Gods way! Stay on that Narrow Path! It's difficult but the rewards are many and you know what its fun! Don't think that just because you’re a Christian that you ought to run out and by the first pair of wooden underwear you come across, no way! It’s just the opposite, laugh, have fun and revel in Christ!

Matthew 7:14 Narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it.

...I'll be sending out them termites for them gungies soon!

It’s time to plug into the cross and time to start growing up. We can’t sit in the pews forever; they are getting to small for us! We have to grow up! Get up and do something productive. God wants you, are you ready to answer that call? Besides, Lemon Sucking is just too bitter to keep up. Bitterness rots the soul, let it go and let God do a healing work inside you.